My group is tight-knit, and I have friends who have known me throughout this journey with Epilepsy and those who knew me long before seizures became part of my everyday life.

Heading back to work really got me thinking about ability and how able I am to manage my Epilepsy, manage my household, take care of a 5-year-old and…work.

I live in constant fear of when the next seizure will strike; where I’ll be when it does strike and who will be with me. I’m not always public with my fears, but they are incredibly distracting and controlling. Many times, it’s so easy to keep them bottled up.

I was thinking this morning, are there some realistic New Year’s resolutions that I actually might adhere to? And, can I make sure they not only benefit and define me, but are also epilepsy issues I care so deeply about?

Having the courage to identify yourself with not just the negative, but mainly the positive is a gift. And, it’s something I’ve worked hard to achieve. I’m determined to not be labeled…

Memory loss due to my seizures is something I know I will always struggle with, and the fact that it will most likely worsen is quite daunting, but I’m thankful for my close friends and family who can tolerate and console me.

The fact of the matter is, every state has a law that applies to drivers who have seizures. It’s up to our doctors to make sure we are abiding those laws, but it’s also up to those of us who live with Epilepsy to adhere to them.

So here we are…National Epilepsy Awareness Month; 30 days in which we have a platform to push our message of hope, support and advocacy.

So much of what we talk about when it comes to Epilepsy advocacy and awareness centers around erasing the stigma of living life with seizures. Collectively, we wonder over and over…why don’t we, as people who live with Epilepsy or care for someone living with Epilepsy, receive attention…attention we think we deserve?

Call it a side effect of living with Epilepsy, or call it a behavioral disorder. I admit, I begin to lose it if we don’t have a 6 month supply of toilet paper in the house.